Stop hating yourself! This was a strong word Pastor Bill had for someone during his message yesterday. You can be told again and again that God loves you, but without a healthy self-image, you will have trouble receiving God's love. If you see yourself as unworthy of His love, you won’t be able to love yourself. And if you can’t freely receive God’s love, you can’t freely give it away.
Your self-image is based on images and feelings that shape your perception of yourself. It encompasses both mental pictures and emotional experiences. Proverbs 23:7 reveals this truth: “As he thinks in his heart, so is he.” The way you see yourself and feel about yourself way down deep in your heart, reveals who you will be and what you will become. Paul declared in 2 Corinthians 10:5 that we are to “cast down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.” To develop a positive self-image that nurtures a healthy relationship with God and ultimately with others, it’s crucial to challenge and overcome negative thoughts and embrace obedience to the Word.
A healthy self-image is composed of three essential elements. The first is a sense of identity, of belonging, or being loved. Simply put, this is the awareness that you’re wanted, accepted, known, and cared for. The second is a sense of worth and value. This is the belief that you have something worth offering in this world. The third is a sense of being able to capably accomplish something in this life. You know you can do a task you undertake.
One of the factors that contributes powerfully to your self-image is what you have experienced in life. This is the influence of the outward world on your development. These experiences begin the moment you are born. Your experiences reveal how you were treated, how you are raised, and how you related to people in the early years of your life. When you were a little child, you had no understanding of who you were, but as you grew you began to gain an image of yourself. Where did you get this image? From what people “mirrored” back to you. You recognized the way important people in your life reacted and responded to you; you saw yourself through their understanding, and you grew to reflect it.
When Paul wrote about growing up spiritually in 1 Corinthians 13:9-12, he used this of idea of a child growing up and “mirroring” the reactions and responses of others.
Your knowledge, including your understanding of yourself, is imperfect. As a child, you spoke, thought, and reasoned in a childlike manner. But as you matured, you let your childish ways go, yet, until you grow up spiritually, you will see yourself as a reflection of how others reacted and responded to you.
A child only partially understands love. As we grow up and mature, we develop a deeper, more profound understanding of love. Our knowledge and feelings are largely shaped by the way our family members respond to us. We observe their expressions, hear their words, and witness their reactions, which provide us with insights into our own identities and who we will become. As these gradually become an integral part of us, we gradually take on the characteristics and qualities of the person we see in our family’s mirror.
If you haven’t grown spiritually, you’ll constantly seek love, acceptance, and care. This is because you don’t have a sense of being loved, accepted, and belonging to God; you’ll try to earn the love He has freely given you. You’ll see your mistakes, sins, and life through the lens of others, not realizing the new creation you are in Christ. One day, you’ll have perfect knowledge. Then you’ll see God face-to-face. Now you know in part, but then you’ll understand yourself fully, even as you’ve been fully understood by God. If your self-image isn’t being transformed by the Word of God, the partial understanding you have now will never grow. You’ll continue to see yourself as if in a darkened mirror.
Do you need a new mirror? If low self-esteem has been ingrained in you, it becomes challenging for you to experience love and acceptance from God, and a sense of worth in your work for Him. Many spiritual struggles are not spiritual at all. Although they may seem and feel like God’s judgment, they come from low self-esteem reflected in the family mirror.
Only God’s Word, His perfect mirror, reflects who you really are in Jesus! Only Jesus can redeem a poor self-image! Only the continual renewing of your mind can transform you to see yourself the way God sees you.
The redemption of your self-image is a journey. It is a process. It begins as a commitment, but continues as an intentional choice. You must follow through on your commitment. Otherwise, you’re only fooling yourself. If you don’t listen to the Word and obey it, it’s like glancing at your face in a mirror; you see yourself, walk away, and forget what you look like (James 1:22-24). The Lord wants you to always know who you are in Him! He wants you to always remember He loves, accepts, and cares for you. He wants you to make yourself captive to His Word and to be obedient to it.
There are other factors that contribute to our self-image: our inner life, Satan, and God and His Word. I’ll try to share these in the upcoming days. If you are someone who suffers from a poor self-image, I’m praying for you. It’s my prayer you’ll diligently seek the healing God has sent to you in His Word to deliver you (Psalm 107:20).
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